Phone Call from the Easter Bunny

Aiden and I were playing down in the cul-de-sac with the girls his age who live on the street earlier this afternoon when Aiden ran home for a bathroom break and was gone for several minutes too long. When he returned, he was carrying a piece of the easter candy that had been double-bagged and hidden 7 feet off the ground on a shelf in the pantry. Luckily he had waited to show me the take from his plundering and asked if he could eat it before opening it. I was already fairly put out after wrangling him all day since he got off the bus in a foul mood (although his report from school said he'd followed the rules well) and him spoiling his easter suprises was the last straw. I told Aiden that the candy was not his but was the Easter Bunny's and we'd have to talk to him about Aiden's mistake tonight. At dinner I quickly texted my dad, added a clip art image to display when he called on my iPhone and waited. About 30 minutes later my phone rang & lit up with a HUGE picture of the Easter Bunny, which I showed Aiden and he ran away. I followed Aiden and flipped it to speaker phone so he could hear the slightly nasily, carrot-munching voice of the Easter Bunny himself. The EB told Aiden that it was not okay for him to get into things that were not his and that there would be no Easter candy given until Easter. Aiden listened in pure terror, half-hiding his face at some moments and at others, staring wide-eyed at the giant clip art bunny image still showing on my iPhone and nodding silently at everything the EB was saying. He could barely mutter his answers when we asked him to confirm he understood and agreed he would not touch anything of mommy's or any Easter candy. After the Easter Bunny had addressed the issue (while pausing to excuse himself as he munched on his dinner of carrots), he reminded Aiden that he was really good friends with Santa Claus, at which time Brian had to be completely excused from the conversation and I could barely control my snickering! Aiden said good-bye and Brian walked him back for bath time while I slipped into the office and my dad and I both burst into fits of laughter while I scolded myself for not thinking to grab the camcorder. His easter bunny voice was hands-down the funniest thing I've heard all year! I gave him a play-by-play of the day's events and Aiden's terror-stricken face until I had laughed away all my frustrations and chalked the day up to being one of the most hilariously memorable parenting experiences thus far. I was informed that "Santa" can be texted any time throughout the year as well should the need arise for a phone call from him. I have the best dad EVER!!! Poor Aiden. In a shaky voice on the verge of tears he asked Heavenly Father in his prayers tonight that the Easter Bunny wouldn't take away all his candy. I felt my heart soften and decided that maybe the easter bunny can leave behind on the shelf the big pink egg containing a ring pop that was the most prized of all the candy and the one he ran down the street to ask if he could open. Perhaps then he'd know his prayers were answered while the rest of the candy resides elsewhere so I can avoid any more loot & plunder attempts. My dad was exactly right when he told me I need to be grateful for Aiden's healthy body that was able to climb up the shelves (albeit such stunts could still land him in a wheelchair) and that he's mentally healthy enough that we get to celebrate and pass on easter traditions. I guess I needed that phone call from a wise easter bunny tonight, too! Love you daddy. :)

Christmas Cookies

'Twas the day before Christmas and one tradition must stand:
Decorating cookies! We chose a gingerbread man.

With Aiden beside Tay, rolling his dough,

Sam cleaned up the mess that rained down on their toes.

The dough was store-bought and as sticky as could be.
Tay cursed every stuck candycane, star and tree.
Ten is good enough! We won't need that many,
Especially since Aiden has the attention span of a flea.
Lined up on pans in neat, tidy rows
Were the christmas cookies, all ready to go:



Shapes for decorating and tiny dough balls
Each sprinkled with sugar - we had it all!



The last confection going into the oven
Was the cookie made by Aiden with his extra lovin'
Actually it was boogers and snot added to his mix
Let's not tell dad - it will be our little trick!
He pounded and rolled the dough with great glee
Then arranged his creation on his pan quite proudly.
Look mom I'm done! He said with a whoop.
A perfect replica of snowy dog poop:



Out of the oven it came when the timer went ding
(Only the coolest mom would bake such a thing!)
"This one's for Santa" said Aiden, "I'll save it for him!"
"That's so sweet, Aiden!" (Thank goodness for Sam...)
I think this year is turning out to be the best
Because holidays with humor totally lower the stress!
So each year when I feel there's just too much to do,
We'll return to the tradition of gingerbread poo.
Who can be grinchy with such a hilarity on their plate?
Especially years from now when we can tell Aiden's dates
Of how, at age 3, a tradition of bathroom humor was made
All because our family was blessed with the hilarious Aiden Kade.

Family Halloween

We had a fun family Halloween with Brian & Aiden dressed up like Vikings and Tay being their kidnapped fair maiden:





The kiddo just looks like a marauder doesn't he? This year he finally got the hang of dressing up for candy. :)

Hitting Mom is a BAD Idea...

Our Toys R Us was having a sale and was stuffed full of clearance items so after Aiden did so well at getting his flu "shot" (nasal spray version), I took him up there to play at the store while I tackled our list of birthday & cousin gifts. An hour later we're in the checkout line when I tell Aiden no, he cannot play with some tiny breakable junk toy by the register. He freaks out, begins screaming and trying to hit me. I wheel us up to the register to pay and he hits my hands, smashing them against the shopping cart bar then strikes me twice more on the arm as I ignore him and unload our cart. When my back is turned, he lands a blow so forcefully under my shoulder blade that it forces an exhale, I wince in pain and I can hear all the moms and grandmothers behind me gasp at the fleshy THUD from his strike. I turn quickly, eyes flashing with anger but controlling my own reactions and hiss that hitting is not allowed, then push our cart forcefully away from me so it rolls to an empty cart area near the door with Aiden still sitting in it. He screams, cries and wails at an enormous volume for the next 2 minutes while I finish my purchase. All eyes are on me. What else is new? I actually have a half-second to note that after hearing everyone gasp, my first thought was for Aiden's future success at school if we don't curtail this hitting and that the first familiar prick of embarrassment was extinguished by my next thought of what I should do to stop this horrible hitting problem. Who has time to care what complete strangers think!

I have Aiden apologize to me before I wipe his eyes, help him blow his nose and remove him from the cart. He walks calmly with me to the car, as if he has never misbehaved in his life. My back is dully aching the entire drive home and the car is silent as I work through in my mind what I should do. Hitting as punishment for hitting is never the right answer so that is out. Time outs, that may work for other children, are not reliable with Aiden because they spawn toy-throwing rages that only allow him more physical expression for his anger. (Even if there are no toys, he will rip the decor off the wall in his room and throw those, simply because he's been put in time out.) Difficult child and time-outs don't really work. I'd looked up several parenting things on LDS.org and all of it said to discipline firmly but with kindness. Okay....how? Another parenting book comes to mind that said discipline should benefit the recipient, giving them opportunity to learn instead of taking away the learning opportunity by putting the child in time-out. Fine. How? I then thought of how truly difficult Aiden can be and how Brian and I pray every night that we will know the right things to do for him that he may learn and grow well. I am nearly beginning to think "why is there so little help for me?" when an idea suddenly pops into my head and my mouth begins saying it before I have even thought it through but it's the best idea I've gotten yet! I tell Aiden that when he gets angry and his hands want to hit that it means they are not getting enough exercise and we need to do things that will help exercise them so they won't want to hit when he feels angry. I actually smile when I get the idea of what his "exercise" should be:



Last night I cooked dinner for a family who just had twins - their 4th and 5th children - so I had to cook for an army and my splattered stovetop showed it. Scrubbing is good exercise for hands that like to hit...



....and so is cleaning the TV...

...and unloading the dishwasher...

...and scrubbing out the sink with Comet...

...Windexing the back door glass...

...and cleaning all the sticky fingerprints off the hope chest.

Yep, hitting mom is a BAD IDEA! However when it came to meeting the demands of discipline with kindness in a way that taught him without using harshness, this idea was pure genius and totally inspired. And the more I watched him clean the more thoughts came to my mind about how this same thing can be used when he's not listening and obeying (needs to practice listening to cleaning instructions and following through) and to when he's refusing to do things (needs to practice doing more things, like household tasks, when he is asked to) and as a consequence to defiance, mess making and the general mayhem he creates, this will be a great way to teach through tactile activity that he cannot go through life wreaking havoc or he will be continually presented with such "opportunities for learning at home"! I guess it takes one really good whack in the back during our hundredth temper tantrum to create the scene for me to list out everything I know, confess the things I don't know and think "Okay, HOW?!!" before the moment is ideal for the perfect answer. Our tactile boy needs tactile learning and tactile discipline. It's pretty cool when prayers are answered just when you need it. :)

Imaginative Play CAN Be Taught!

Several months ago I found some curved waldorf blocks (Montecarlo Blocks from Grimm's Spiel & Holz - see below) and while I was shopping online, I stumbled across this picture of colorful blocks that Aiden LOVED looking at online:



Inspired by it but not liking the ridiculous price of buying all the block sets shown (about $500), I got the curved blocks, bought some unfinished cut wood shapes off Etsy and picked up some rainbow glass pebbles at Michael's so Aiden could invent his own make believe things.

In July I took Aiden to the library and also let him pick out DVDs from their scant collection. He selected a Tinkerbell movie where she invents things and goes on some ridiculous adventure. Aiden was so enthralled by the way she used sticks, leaves & natural things to make "machines" that he wanted to "make Tinkerbell fairy things". I suggested we start by making Tinkerbell a place to live out of his blocks & things, which spiraled into a whole world of imaginary play for him that I'm loving!

See the rainbow pebble cobblestone walkway? (A "sidewalk" for "driving on") Aiden also decided she needed some mushrooms planted nearby her little gnome house.

I built the blue block wall (first picture above) and let Aiden watch me. Then I began making the above multi-colored wall and got about 3 pieces touching before he completely took over! When we first got the curvy block set he was *PISSED* that they would not line up to make nice, straight sidewalks. (My exact intent - the kid should learn something besides straight lines!) Once I showed him how to stack the blocks, make curvy-edged lagoons for his plastic dinosaurs & how to balance the symetrical arched blocks, he's enjoyed these much more! I have too and am always on the lookout for more creative waldorf playthings I can pick up on Etsy or make myself. :)

Meanwhile, it's also nice to have fun, silly things to pretend play with. I would have loved something like this as a child and would have played for hours on end! (No doubt it's why I'm giving them to Aiden now!) And I'm not worried about the "girlie fairy" things rubbing off.... Not shown is Frank the Combine Tractor plowing down everything in sight and then Chuy the Bulldozer picking up the "what a mess" glass pebbles and putting them into his deep fry basket (a vintage object I found in Granbury that is now a sand & water play toy), shoving the basket into one of the empty cubbys (that doubles as a play oven since I lined it with a metal oven rack) and cooking them into "candy". All of this ended by throwing the glass pebbles & blocks everywhere - Hurricane Aiden style - before he calmly walked out of the playroom, towing star blanket, to go wreak havoc somewhere else! Yep, he's got that fairy play thing down.... LOL!

The Blokus King

Aiden has recently gotten into (sort of) playing preschool games and one day two weeks ago he spied the Blokus box as I was putting away one of his games with the rest of them. He asked for them and I paused, thinking they were nothing but little pentominoes (educational) and they were brightly colored, making them easy to pick up if he decided to throw them. Sure, why not?

What I didn't expect was for Aiden to become so serious and spend a FULL 45 MINUTES IN SILENCE attempting to fill his Blokus board with all the pieces. I was stunned! Why hadn't I thought of that activity sooner? I fetched the camera because I thought no one would believe me and here they are (pics are from August 11 which is why he still has hair!)



He's in deep concentration, sitting nicely, not throwing anything...who is this kid?



Logically testing & turning the pieces to see which way it will fit...

Experimenting with new combinations to see if he can squeeze more pieces in the same area previously occupied by pieces that did not fit together nicely... (That would be Brian's efficiency he's working with! Hopefully combined with mom's spatial intelligence?)

And now that he's done, he's got to drive Filmore on it because he is only 3 and EVERYTHING he builds must be "road tested" this way to determine it's driveability...LOL!

Now when I need a few minutes of quiet to get something done, Blokus comes to the rescue! Gosh I love this kid and sometimes he sure does impress me with his math-and-logic-based creativity!

Preschool Fever and.....Cereal?

Aiden has suddenly fallen in LOVE with all things preschool. I've been doing "preschool" at home with him for months but he's just now caught on with the whole excitement of back to school.

I'm quietly against child avertising so I only let Aiden watch PBS kids (very, very minimal ads for things like raisins, health food, children's gyms, etc.) and DVDs. He doesn't see hardly any "regular" TV. He has, however, seen the new Frosted Mini Wheats commercials where the cereal squares sit on the children's shoulders as they bound off the school bus, dressed in brand new clothes with coordinating backpacks bursting with brand new school supplies. This obviously has caught the imagination of Aiden because when we were at the store today picking up bread, he spotted the cereal from an impossible distance away. (Ooh, good! He got mom's 20/15 vision!) We then were NOT leaving the store without "preschool cereal". (Hmm... 5 grams of fiber and it's a carb - besides oreos - that he'll eat? DEAL.)

When we got home we were NOT having anything for lunch besides "preschool cereal". I poured him a bowl and watched him happily shovel in a few bites before I noticed him pause, look at the box, glance over his shoulder, look at the box, poke his cereal..... I reminded him to eat cereal with a spoon when he said "I want cereal to sit on my shoulder?" I laughed out loud and had to explain to him what he'd seen on TV was pretend but assured him this was indeed "preschool cereal" and that it helped him do good at preschool things. (Bah! It's not completely untrue. I just doubt the cereal will teach him the proper order of numbers bewteen 12 and 20 and that "forty six" is not one of them....)

With any luck this will help me get some food in him on the mornings he'll have SPARKS (the free mom & tot pre-school our district does to help children learn what is expected of them in a classroom). Now if only they had "preschool chair glue" so I could get the kid to sit still or "preschool pay attention fairy dust" so he would listen to directions longer than a single word! Even better would be a "preschool snare gun" and "preschool tranquilizer darts" but CPS may frown upon those.... For now I'm tempted to load up the yellow backpack Aiden sometimes runs around in with bricks to slow him down a bit but with my luck it would only build up his endurance! :D Ah, the joys of parenting!

Aiden's Haircut: Phase 2

Tay: I couldn't bear to see Aiden's head completely shaved the day he cut his own hair off but after taking him out in public for 5 days and the "stripe" getting funny looks, I decided it might be best for everyone's patience to just buzz him and be done. Yesterday I carefully measured the hair he had left, clipped on a 2 guard and buzzed it clean & even. :) He doesn't even look like my kid! LOL!

The WORST part about it is I was mailed a fun new tub of Got2Be Sculpting Paste to try as part of a product-launch word-of-mouth-advertising campaign THE DAY BEFORE HE CUT HIS HAIR! The product is a cream-to-dry something that goes on, helps you create a gorgeous messy bed-head then dries to a touchable, matte, soft finish that then holds the shape without being crunchy. Aiden looked like a little movie star by the time I was done with his hair and the turd cut it all off the next morning! These next several months will be AGONY while I wait for his hair to grow out. Meanwhile I'm (sort of unintentionally) driving Aiden NUTS by rubbing his fuzzy buzzed head! It's so....fuzzy! LOL! He's told me repeatedly "I cut off all my hair. It's all gone forever" and "I like my hair short or spikey? I like it spikey." Looks like he misses his hair, too! He'll learn. In this house you do not mess with hair!

So Tell Us: Does Aiden look more like Bri or Tay with his hair buzzed?
(Personally I think he looks like Eric's stunt double but that's just me!)

Aiden Update

We were at Hobby Lobby today where some teens (I am guessing) damaged a portion of the store by throwing fully-unscrewed-and-opened bottles of craft paint across the shelves EVERYWHERE. On a nearby clearance aisle Aiden got ahold of a tiny bottle of blue model car paint someone had opened and left within easy grabbing distance. As I was distracted by avoiding the paint explosion puddles, I looked up to see Aiden COVERED in blue paint, ruining both pieces of clothing he was wearing. I was thinking about how these inconsiderate strangers, with their obvious lack of parenting, would never realize their actions caused us a ruined outfit and incredible amounts of frustration. I don't want Aiden to be that way and yet I seem to have been dealt that card to battle.

So Aiden saw an Occupational Therapist at the end of July and I got some answers, which I wanted, but they were upsetting. In fact, they were heartbreaking. Aiden has no neurological issues at all and while he showed a shadow of some possible lingering sensory issues, all the tactile play therapy I did with him this spring seems to have helped him overcome it. (If only that complement had made me feel better.) However Aiden scored very high on his intelligence screening and as soon as I entered the room to hear the test results, the therapist observed a marked change in Aiden's behavior. In short, he's wicked smart and will creatively manipulate to get his way.

Okay, so all kids do this. No big deal, right? Just give them firm discipline and maybe a swat on the bum, right? Well...yes and no for Aiden. The first part of the problem is me. I disliked how harshly I was disciplined growing up and vowed to be much kinder to my children. I also pick my battles a little too well, which has given Aiden the belief that there are loopholes to be exploited. In addition to this we are discovering that without extremely clear, firm and without-fail consistency, Aiden will start pulling out bizzare tricks from up his sleeve for us to contend with so our focus wanders off HIM and onto the messes/noise/destruction he's causing. (Included in this are his autistic-type behaviors since they actually made me pause and wonder if he had control over them or not so I did not punish, I just re-directed the behavior believing he may not be able to help it.) Aiden's mess-making, toy throwing and strange vomiting fits (fingers in his mouth while crying to trigger gagging) also fall in this category.

The most difficult & frustrating part is that Aiden needs SOOO much firmness that feels like it borderlines on unkindness and parental dictating. For now giving Aiden more than basic choices seems to invite manipulation while simple requests, like put your underwear on, have suddenly turned into TWO HOUR battles. Like yesterday when Aiden refused to put his underwear back on after going to the bathroom and I walked him to his room and told him he could come out when they were on. TWENTY SIX TIMES over TWO HOURS I had to put him back in his room and listen to him kicking the door and damaging the drywall while I vacuumed, mopped, cleaned the playroom and then sat down to begin playing with his Legos myself. I was 5 minutes in to Lego playtime when he emerged, exhausted, with his underwear on. (Backwards.) It was extremely difficult to return him to his room every 4 minutes and listen to the HOURS of wailing & banging but the dings in the wall will be worth having one less thing to fight over him with.

Unfortunately I don't really know what to do with Aiden's new tourettes-like screaming gibberish outbursts in public followed by "Mom don't hit me!" when I haven't ever hit him, aside from spanks on the bum, and at that moment I didn't even touch him. (Tell me this isn't a difficult child. I dare you. I also dare you to ask me when we're having another one...) Most mothers would have beaten him to a pulp by now, trying to spank the misbehavior out of him. That doesn't work for Aiden - instead it gives him the all-clear to whollop kids his age, which has made him aware of his massive height advantage and adds "bully" to the list of things we must contend with. Instead, Brian hit the nail on the head. We have to combat stubborness with stubborness until each melts the other's away and loving give-and-take can resume.

The worst part is I MUST learn to control some of the aspects of my own kindness in order to be the parent I need to be for Aiden. He MUST be ignored when screaming, no matter how much I know this parenting tactic bothers Brian. He MUST have stated consequences followed through with, no matter how unkind it seems to walk him back to his room wailing & gaging, threatening to vomit on his new carpet, for the 26th time. He MUST learn proper behavior first and taste of consequence before he can understand true kindness from his parents and I completely hate this needed period of unbending parenting but I'm doing it. Because worse than 3 year-old temper tantrums is the thought of how truly unkind it is to let a child enter the world where he thinks it's okay to take his frustrations out on the general public in totally unacceptable ways. I guess there is an early warning and a good parenting lesson learned from open, dripping, splattered bottles of paint and one ruined toddler outfit during a morning at Hobby Lobby. What mother wouldn't trade a toddler wardrobe to ensure her child never becomes that type of adult? I simply have to keep reminding myself: The messes & house damage are temporary while the lesson is lasting. Otherwise the orderly house is only temporary and the damage to him is lasting.

Gear Head

Recently Aiden has become interested in gears. (Absolutely anything mechanical fascinates him!) He had pointed out pricy boxes of Gears! Gears! Gears! in the Children's Museum gift shop and I had the thought to check eBay, figuring I could run anything used through a dishwasher cycle and save a ton of money. I found an auction for a "large box of gears" starting at $5. I was the only bidder and won the box, excited that Aiden would have some gears to play with for a fraction of the price of a single set. The seller said "watch for a really big box to arrive soon!" Yeah, sure, that's fine.

The next day a FedEx truck backed up the drive and unloaded what looked like a small dishwasher. I wondered what on EARTH I had ordered that could possibly be that huge. When the delivery man heaved it off the dolly into our entryway, I recognized the familiar tinkling of plastic toys hitting one another and thought "What have I done?"

Aiden and I spent the next TWO HOURS creating an assembly line to wash & rinse the plastic pieces by the collander full and dry them on my biggest family-size beach towels. An excessive amount of gears are now at Aiden's creative disposal. Here is a picture of the lot after washing them, which barely shows the wild enormity of what was in that box: (photos taken 7/9/10)

These pictures really make the mess look tame, just like the auction picture did. The whole time I was washing nearly 1000-something pieces I was wondering WHO in their right mind buys this many toys for their child. (Besides me, who was hoodwinked by deceiving eBay images showing a box that looked no bigger than two shoe boxes put together.) I'm letting Aiden enjoy them for a while to see what he plays with before donating a chunk to the church nursery & giving some to Sheena for Kyler to play with, too.

The seller was super sweet - and obviously in clean out mode - because a Thomas the Train crane car, a set of magnetic Lincolin Logs and some oddly unrelated plastic building pieces that resemble tinker toys were also found in the box among all the gears with a sweet note from the seller to enjoy everything and she was thrilled to be rid of all of it. Imagine that... :)

Accidents, Ant Bites and Staph, Oh My!

It's been a very full week of exciting oddities at our house this week. It started off on Monday night. We were at a friend's house for a group FHE, enjoying some chit chat in the kitchen while the children played in the back yard. Aiden came in wailing with three fire ant bites and moments later was fine after a hug, a little sympathy and a big ordeal about the Benadryl stick not touching him in the slightest. Ant bites - no big deal right?

Tuesday Aiden's Behaviorist came to go over her behavioral plan for him. (She had awesome ideas!) Immediately after Mindy left we went with our next door neighbors, including their 10 year-old daughter Madison who Aiden loves & 8 year-old Parker to the Downtown Aquarium. We had a BLAST! Aiden got to pet a shark, a stingray, a prickly sea urchin & a starfish. So cool! A downpour outside trapped us inside the gift shop where I noticed Aiden itch his ant bites, still refusing to let me put anything on them. I had doused his hands in hand sanitizer immediately after petting the sea life so I figured he would be okay until we got across the street to Hard Rock where I could scrub his hands down before lunch. The day ended with a train ride, a couple rounds on the carousel and a Ferris Wheel ride. Aiden had a BLAST and fell asleep in the stroller during the 4 minute walk to the car. :)

Wednesday morning just before 6 am Aiden wakes up crying, sporting a foot and ankle that are pinky-purple and swollen to twice their normal size. His ant bites had been itched open in his sleep and the whole foot looks painful. I have to cuddle with him and soothe him, explaining that the doctor is still asleep until I can call in at 7:30 to get him an appointment. He saw his pediatrician first thing and she is certain of a staph infection, especially after I tell her about our aquarium trip. He is to start heavy antibiotics immediately since the infection is now spreading up his ankle & leg. He's JUST come off a 10 day round of antibiotics for a sinus infection he got before July 4th so the kid has been sick nearly all month. This is not what we need, especially since this is supposed to be my first day implementing Aiden's behavior techniques and the kid can't even walk, let alone stop whining long enough to hear what I am saying. Not fun.

Thursday is a bit better. He's crabby & cranky on his medicine all day but I survive, knowing one of my girlfriends is coming over to do crafts that night while Bri goes with the guys to see a movie. Just before I leave Bri & Aiden to run to Wal-Mart to pick up craft paint, Aiden falls off his bed, catching the corner of his mouth on the beveled wood edge of the footboard. I hear his scream-cry and find him spitting blood all over Brian's dress shirt. It's deeper than it is wide and Bri and I wonder if he needs glue or stitches. It's stopped bleeding so we let him go to sleep, agreeing we'll see how it looks in the morning:



Poor kid! It scabbed and seems like it will close nicely but I'm still going to be doctoring it so he doesn't end up with a scar. Luckily he's on a mega-dose of antibiotics at the moment so he's got a great chance of it healing properly with no infection. All my friends keep calling, wondering why I'm not at the pool (see: already infected & antibiotics have caused diarrhea) and I don't know if I can take much more of this accident-prone craziness!

Potty Training Mishaps

Tay: I really can't complain - Aiden practically potty trained himself but since he's working with equipment I don't have there were a few things I didn't know to warn him about. First of all, there were a couple days early on in June where Aiden thought it was HILARIOUS to "miss" the toilet as he was sitting on it and pee out over the edge of it. Bonus if he could get the stream to squirt through the tiny gap between the toilet seat & the porcelain bowl from where he was perched. (Seriously, where do boys learn these games? His dad works around the clock so at least I know Brian isn't teaching him this...)

Any ways, this hoopla lasted about three frustrating days until one afternoon on June 16 when I heard Aiden whimper "MOMMY!" from our bathroom in a surprised, almost frightened sounding voice. I dashed in to find him looking like this:



You can't see it but the wall, part of the side of his hair and his ear are all sprayed with pee! Apparently Aiden had sat down "wrong", with legs together, squishing everything so he was pointed straight upward when he relieved himself, soaking his shirt and spraying himself in the face! From this point on Aiden was flawlessly careful about pointing himself down into the toilet - as if any direction but down would spray him in the face - and I haven't had to clean up any liquid olympics messes in the bathroom ever since. Yay for good lessons learned through experience!

Helpful Hollie

Tay: Help sometimes comes in the strangest ways but it does come! Boy do we have a story to tell...

About a month ago I set Aiden down with a bucket of moon sand in a disposable foil tray at the kitchen table to keep him occupied while I rounded up all the laundry. (Big mistake - moon sand has now been banned until I forget about this incident or he's 14, whichever comes first.) As soon as I left the room, Aiden began one of his compulsive throwing fits (hence the need for a therapist). He was actually trying to pelt Hollie where she was perched in her hanging cage, he later told me, but that didn't explain how orange sand dusted every inch of the kitchen & living room from the stovetop to the couch and beyond. Hollie did, however, have chunks of orange moon sand that had made it through the bars of her cage and she herself was dusted in quite a bit of it. All of this in a mere 30 seconds. (Let me interject I have been reading the Harry Potter books and I feel a kinship and deep understanding towards Mrs. Weasley...I have my own real life Fred & George rolled into one!) I was so beyond frustrated that I actually left the moon sand mess and loaded up Aiden as fast as I could into the car and kept him out of the house for the entire rest of the day. Brian was a total sweetheart and vacuumed it all up for me that night seeing how I was frustrated beyond words. Poor Hollie had to clean herself.

The next day I am again doing something necessary to the running of the household when I hear Hollie begin shrieking at the top of her little lungs. I bolt into the kitchen to find Aiden with the refrigerator door open, ketchup bottle in his hand, pouring a mountain on his plate for who knows what mess-making reason. He's looking at me and glancing at her as if he just had someone tattle on him. Hollie is quiet again as I clean up the mess and send Aiden off to play.

Later that same afternoon I hear Hollie again. Aiden has walked into the living room carrying a toy golf club (which he often would hit her cage with) and seems to be eyeing the place for something to whack around and destroy. Club is confiscated and put away. High, high away.

That evening Aiden has gotten a hold of something else (the details escape me - crackers maybe) but was making a smashed & scattered mess of it on the table while my back is turned cooking dinner. Hollie is squaking & flapping like it's a 4-alarm fire. She stops instantly the moment I intervene to clean up the mess. Then it hits me - something I had read a while ago comes to mind: Parakeets are extremely intelligent little birds with enormous capacity to learn.

Hollie had so severely disliked being pelted with sand in her cage and, I assume, was so thoroughly unhappy with having to preen the stuff out of her own feathers that she had learned when Aiden was making a mess she had better start calling for me or she was going to get pelted until she was dirty all over again. She had put herself to work as my own little Aiden alarm, acting as a second set of spying eyes over everything he was doing and alerting me at the first sign of trouble! Since then she's proven accurate, sounding a specific squak when Aiden is getting in to something that brings me running. (See, I can be trained, too!) That little bird has been a great addition to the family, if for no other reason than I needed exactly that kind of help. :)